I like it when things are tidy. I can work in a mess, but then at the end? Let's get this place cleaned up! Two or three times a day we do a "house sweep" because with 4 boys at home all day, it doesn't take long for the place to look like a Walmart train went off the tracks in the living room.
A mess is unsettling to me. It's tiring. It's stressful! I feel chaotic inside when things are chaotic around me and I'm the boss around here so "OK guys, it's time for a house sweep!".
My sister, Karen, said it best when she said this: "Life is messy!"
It's a common catch phrase now but that was the first time I had heard someone articulate the very thing that was constantly grating against my sensibilities. Thankfully hearing it out loud helped me view it differently: life is very messy.
And. That's. OK.
A mess is unsettling to me. It's tiring. It's stressful! I feel chaotic inside when things are chaotic around me and I'm the boss around here so "OK guys, it's time for a house sweep!".
My sister, Karen, said it best when she said this: "Life is messy!"
It's a common catch phrase now but that was the first time I had heard someone articulate the very thing that was constantly grating against my sensibilities. Thankfully hearing it out loud helped me view it differently: life is very messy.
And. That's. OK.
When I was first married and mothering I cleaned house like someone's life depended on it. I didn't even particularly care about things being perfectly clean, I just thought that's what a "good wife" should do. It grieves me now to look back on the baby- and toddlerhoods of our two oldest sons. I missed so much of them! I spent so much time cleaning house and spring-cleaning the house and keeping up the house - and so little time just sitting, holding my babies. With our third child I had a.) begun to learn the value of cherishing my children and b.) flat-out run out of time to "baby" my house so I had also started to come into balance. It was our fourth-born though that really clicked me into center on the issue. When Daniel was born Chad was working on medical school requirements around 100 hours a week so I did pretty much everything else. I was fine with that but it didn't take long to recognize that schooling a second grader, juggling two toddlers, nursing a newborn AND keeping up the house wasn't even an option. I remember saying to my father-in-law, "I used to think 'piles' were only for dirty laundry! Now I'm just glad when there's something clean to grab from somewhere!" I virtually abandoned the house with the exception of keeping it safe and livable and guess what I did? I sat in a chair and I held that baby. Praise God I didn't miss them all . . .
When Josiah was around 3 someone gave me the idea of pouring flour on the floor and letting him play in it. I though that sounded crazy! It sounded so, so . . . messy!! But I'll tell you what - I gritted my teeth and I dumped half a bag of flour out on the tile and that boy just played and played and giggled and touched and played and felt and smiled and dug around in that flour. It was awesome! It was a pain to clean up but that was nothing compared to the joy he and I shared over half a bag of flour!
Now there are dishes on the counter and laundry in piles and shoes strewn about but I recognize that all of these are signs of life! There's also the training of young men in the doing of chores and the responsibility of being part of a family and sometimes that process is messier than the house will ever be!
When Josiah was around 3 someone gave me the idea of pouring flour on the floor and letting him play in it. I though that sounded crazy! It sounded so, so . . . messy!! But I'll tell you what - I gritted my teeth and I dumped half a bag of flour out on the tile and that boy just played and played and giggled and touched and played and felt and smiled and dug around in that flour. It was awesome! It was a pain to clean up but that was nothing compared to the joy he and I shared over half a bag of flour!
Now there are dishes on the counter and laundry in piles and shoes strewn about but I recognize that all of these are signs of life! There's also the training of young men in the doing of chores and the responsibility of being part of a family and sometimes that process is messier than the house will ever be!
The noise at our house is almost constant and some of it is not pleasant. As one of my Treasures would say, "Mama, that squeaks my ears!" The bickering and arguing and complaining are draining and discontentment squeaks my ears, but they are part of life and life is messy. I would like it if my children were loving and polite to each other all the time but they aren't and I'm not always loving and polite either. It's because we all have a little bit of a mess inside of us and here in this thing called family, in this place called home - this is where I pray we will be blessed with the freedom to be our real, messy selves.
Some messes can be cleaned up and some can't, but I have to remember that messes of every kind are made by people and people are precious to the Lord. Apart from God Himself, only two things are eternal: God's Word and people. So Lord Jesus, help me to look at the people and put up with the mess rather than focusing on the mess and - sometimes not very successfully - putting up with the people.
Some messes can be cleaned up and some can't, but I have to remember that messes of every kind are made by people and people are precious to the Lord. Apart from God Himself, only two things are eternal: God's Word and people. So Lord Jesus, help me to look at the people and put up with the mess rather than focusing on the mess and - sometimes not very successfully - putting up with the people.
More often than not there's a Lego everywhere I look and, though I know Legos are bound to be the death of some of you, I have to confess - I feel so happy when I see (yes, even step on) Legos. Our boys live and breathe Legos every day of their lives and I know there will be a time after they've gone that I'll look around my neat, tidy house, thinking, "There's nothing I wouldn't give to come across a Lego." But there won't be one. Today, however, is not that day ~ and I rejoice in the tangible reality.
At our house we celebrate when the toilet clogs because it is a reminder that this is the second year in a row that our proud provider of plumbing problems will not spend the better part of a week in the hospital for chronic constipation. Yep, life is messy. Messy, but glorious.
Sometimes messy is incredibly beautiful . . . like the rolling sparkle-sweet that pops in Josiah's rich, contagious laughter.
~ Daniel's gentle, baby-soft hand rubbing my cheek as his jam-sticky lips whisper, "Mama, I just love you so much!!"
~ Growing sons running around the yard bent in half trying to corral the last of the chickens, laughing to beat the band, filled with the joy of boyhood and the sun-soaked contentment of our little 'farm' here in the suburbs.
Sometimes the messiness of life rages out of control and I realize that for all my fancy talk I don't actually want to play in the big leagues!! I much prefer to pontificate about the rich depths of faith in God and all He can do; then double check tomorrow's To Do list, kiss my babies good night and sleep peacefully the whole night through. But as it turns out, sometimes life is really, really messy . . .
Sometimes one of those precious babies gets diagnosed with a life-threatening disease and we weep the night through asking God if this mess can even be cleaned up! Sometimes God-given dreams get put on hold while we struggle to wait on the Lord because only He could ever deal with this mess. Sometimes all of a sudden the finances are not what we thought they were going to be and Lord? What do we do with this mess?! Relationships flounder and fail and sometimes private tragedies leave us feeling ashamed and we try to hide our mess. But friends? We all have a mess of one kind or another!
I love what Job had to say about it; Job, an ancient fellow supremely qualified to speak to us in our today-mess. He said, "Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" He also said the following; one of the most humble things he could have said given his tragically ravaged situation: "I know my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God." Even when the worst possibility has become reality, God is to be trusted.
When I feel bogged down in overwhelming mess of every kind I remember what my gracious God has promised: "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future!'" God, with all His power and all His love, is in control of this whole crazy mess! There is absolutely nothing beyond His ability to affect His perfect plan for your precious life and for mine!
So today, rest. Trust! And please, be encouraged . . . Even if things seem a bit messy.
At our house we celebrate when the toilet clogs because it is a reminder that this is the second year in a row that our proud provider of plumbing problems will not spend the better part of a week in the hospital for chronic constipation. Yep, life is messy. Messy, but glorious.
Sometimes messy is incredibly beautiful . . . like the rolling sparkle-sweet that pops in Josiah's rich, contagious laughter.
~ Daniel's gentle, baby-soft hand rubbing my cheek as his jam-sticky lips whisper, "Mama, I just love you so much!!"
~ Growing sons running around the yard bent in half trying to corral the last of the chickens, laughing to beat the band, filled with the joy of boyhood and the sun-soaked contentment of our little 'farm' here in the suburbs.
Sometimes the messiness of life rages out of control and I realize that for all my fancy talk I don't actually want to play in the big leagues!! I much prefer to pontificate about the rich depths of faith in God and all He can do; then double check tomorrow's To Do list, kiss my babies good night and sleep peacefully the whole night through. But as it turns out, sometimes life is really, really messy . . .
Sometimes one of those precious babies gets diagnosed with a life-threatening disease and we weep the night through asking God if this mess can even be cleaned up! Sometimes God-given dreams get put on hold while we struggle to wait on the Lord because only He could ever deal with this mess. Sometimes all of a sudden the finances are not what we thought they were going to be and Lord? What do we do with this mess?! Relationships flounder and fail and sometimes private tragedies leave us feeling ashamed and we try to hide our mess. But friends? We all have a mess of one kind or another!
I love what Job had to say about it; Job, an ancient fellow supremely qualified to speak to us in our today-mess. He said, "Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" He also said the following; one of the most humble things he could have said given his tragically ravaged situation: "I know my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God." Even when the worst possibility has become reality, God is to be trusted.
When I feel bogged down in overwhelming mess of every kind I remember what my gracious God has promised: "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future!'" God, with all His power and all His love, is in control of this whole crazy mess! There is absolutely nothing beyond His ability to affect His perfect plan for your precious life and for mine!
So today, rest. Trust! And please, be encouraged . . . Even if things seem a bit messy.
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